Horror Scope

At our Editorial Conference the other day (she talks; I listen) she said, after a forty minute diatribe about what she wanted to do, she said to me ...

"And what are you going to contribute?"

She looked daggers at me, daring me to speak!

After waiting a while to find out if I was going to be allowed, I said "Most magazines have a horoscope; are we going to have one?"

The daggers were still there and she said "I hadn't foreseen that; if you want one, you write it".

So for the sake of a bit of peace, here goes!

For a change, I've dedicated every Zodiac Sign to a different group of the community...

Your Horror Scope by Omah Papah
	Aries (PILOTS) Travel is indicated, especially in easterly directions. Stars should be followed carefully. New horizons loom. Beware of friendly fire.

Taurus (FARMERS) Future promises to breed strong feelings, especially with the birds. Be willing to change with the times. don't be shy; plan now for the future, but don't put all your eggs in one basket!

	Gemini (SPACEMEN) Out of the world opportunity comes your way. Know this and prepare or you may be left up in the air. Mileage expenses should be calculated. Watch out for little green men.

Cancer (MEDICAL PEOPLE) Watch for dodgy administrator. Throw off shackles of self doubt. Dispense pills, advise freely. (Caution, reading this may be hazardous to your health).

	Leo (PRESIDENTS) Remember Leo is king. Avoid ambiguous advice from others. Your word is law. Don’t forget; the Buck stops here.

Virgo (MAIDENS) Romance is indicated. You’ll get many propositions but few proposals. Care should be taken in cars. Avoid accidents, children.

	Libra (POLICE) Take nothing for granted; be thorough, searching. Await action on Friday.

Scorpio (POLITICIANS) Take stings and barbs manfully. Smile, avoid controversy. Timing is important; get out more.

	Sagittarius (MANAGERS) Stress, poise, aims, finger control. Be prepared to pull strings.

Capricorn (HOUSEWIVES) Cycle is a high. Social activities continue. Romance is indicated at the weekend but take capsule tonight.

	Aquarius (SAILORS) Be prepared to make transition to new environment. You stand on firm ground. Loss of familiar establishment imminent.

Pisces (INDEBTED AND OTHER POOR FISH) Read contracts carefully. Promise of gain may be misleading. Think thrift and net profits.

IF TODAY IS YOUR BIRTHDAY, HAPPY BIRTHDAY

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